Penerjemah: Paperplane Editor: Caron_
Kelopak mata He Jichen berkedip malas. Diam-diam dia mengisap rokoknya, seolah tidak mendengar rentetan pertanyaan Gendut yang menekan.
"Chen Ge, kalau kamu suka dia, kejar saja! Kalau kamu tidak bilang, bagaimana dia tahu? Kalau ada laki-laki lain yang lebih cepat bergerak dan berhasil dengannya, kamu yang akan menangis!"
Kilatan gelap melintas di mata He Jichen. Jari-jarinya yang menjepit rokok bergetar halus.
Jakunnya naik turun. Tapi dia tetap diam, dan kembali menyampaikan rokok ke bibirnya.
"Chen Ge, ini waktunya masih pura-pura tenang? Sudah, kalau kamu tidak mau bilang, aku yang bilang! Kalau kamu tidak mengejarnya, aku cari cara untuk membantumu!" Setelah berkata begitu, Gendut langsung berbalik menuju kamar dengan kesal dan tidak sabar.
"Kejar? Kamu pikir aku ingin mengejarnya?" Setelah lama terdiam, He Jichen akhirnya bersuara. "Aku bermimpi mengejarnya; yang kuinginkan hanya berdiri di depan asramanya setiap pagi untuk memberikan sarapan; saat hujan badai, aku ingin memayunginya; saat dia sakit, aku ingin menggendongnya ke rumah sakit..."
Gendut berhenti melangkah, tetapi tidak menoleh ke arah He Jichen.
"Aku bahkan sudah memikirkan skenario pengakuan dan bagaimana aku akan mengatakannya. Dalam hati, aku sudah menghafal kalimat-kalimat itu sampai tak terhitung jumlahnya. Tapi Gendut, kamu tahu? Aku takut. Aku takut dia tidak percaya. Aku takut setelah aku mengaku, kami harus berpisah. Aku takut dia akan berada di posisi yang sulit karena dia menyukai He Yuguang."
Mendengar kalimat terakhir, Gendut menoleh tajam ke arah He Jichen. "Chen Ge... maksudmu Ji Yi... dia-dia suka Yuguang Ge?"
He Jichen tidak menjawab, seolah tidak mendengar.
Dengan raut sedih yang dalam di keningnya, dia menatap lukisan tradisional wanita cantik di dinding.
Dia tampak seperti terjebak dalam situasi yang sulit dan menyakitkan yang tak bisa dia hindari. Dia mengisap rokoknya dalam-dalam. Setelah beberapa lama, perlahan dia menoleh ke arah Gendut. "Gendut..."
Suaranya terdengar sedikit melayang. "Pernahkah kamu menyesali sesuatu? Maksudku, jenis penyesalan yang membuatmu tidak bisa memaafkan dirimu sendiri, sekeras apa pun kamu mencoba."
--
Ji Yi sendirian di ruangan itu.
Dia membuka kotak-kotak makanan yang dibawa Gendut, lalu memilih beberapa camilan yang disukainya. Dia menggigitnya beberapa kali, tapi merasa sudah kenyang, jadi dia mengambil tisu dan membersihkan mulutnya.
Duduk sendirian di kamar membuatnya bosan. Dia dengan malas menggeser layar ponsel untuk mengecek Weibo dan Momen. Karena memang tidak ada yang menarik, Ji Yi memutuskan menyimpan ponselnya.
Mungkin karena ucapan Gendut tadi dipotong He Jichen di saat penting, rasa penasaran Ji Yi masih mengganjal. Karena tidak ada kegiatan lain, dia kembali memikirkan 'gadis Cola'.
Dari nada bicara Gendut, siapa gadis Cola itu bukan rahasia, dan dia seharusnya tahu siapa orangnya...
Ji Yi mengerutkan alis, berpikir keras cukup lama, tapi tidak bisa mengingat satu pun gadis yang dekat dengan He Jichen. Akhirnya dia menggeleng dan menyerah. Dia akan bertanya pada Gendut begitu dia kembali.
Dia tidak tahu kedua orang itu pergi ke mana untuk berbicara; mereka juga belum kembali. Tapi Ji Yi ingin ke toilet. Dia memanggil pelayan untuk memberi tahu bahwa mereka belum selesai makan, lalu menyusuri koridor menuju toilet.
Setelah berjalan sekitar dua puluh meter, dia sampai di sudut tangga. Sebelum berbelok, dia tanpa sengaja mendengar suara He Jichen dan Gendut.
Kebetulan sekali... Rupanya mereka berdua di luar sini?
Chapter 332: Have You Ever Regretted Anything? (2)
Translator: Paperplane Editor: Caron_
He Jichen’s eyelids blinked leisurely as he silently took a drag. He acted as though he hadn’t heard Fatty’s overbearing questions.
“Chen Ge, if you like her, just go for her! If you don’t tell her, how would she know that you like her? If another man took a little more initiative and got together with her, you’d be the one crying!”
Darkness flashed in his eyes as He Jichen’s fingers trembled with the cigarette between them.
His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down, yet he didn’t say a word and continued to put the cigarette to his lips.
“Chen Ge, is this the time to still play cool? Alright, if you won’t say it, I will! If you don’t chase her, then I’ll think of ways to help you!” After he said that, Fatty turned right around and headed for the room with impatience and resentment.
“Chase? You think I want to chase her?” After staying quiet for a long time, He Jichen finally spoke up. “I dream about chasing her; all I want to do is stand outside her dorm every day just to give her breakfast; when it’s stormy outside, I want to be able to hold an umbrella out for her; when she’s not feeling well, I want to carry her to the hospital...”
Fatty stopped walking but he didn’t turn to glance at He Jichen.
“I even thought about the whole setting and how I was going to confess. Deep down, I went through my lines an infinite amount of times, but Fatty, did you know? I was afraid. I was afraid she wouldn’t believe me. I was afraid that after I confessed, we’d be saying our farewells. I was afraid that she’d be put in a difficult spot because she liked He Yuguang.”
Hearing the last line, Fatty abruptly turned his head and looked over at He Jichen. “Chen Ge... did you say that Ji Yi... she-she likes Yuguang Ge?”
He Jichen didn’t respond, acting as if he hadn’t heard Fatty.
With deep sorrow across his forehead, He Jichen stared at the traditional painting of a beautiful woman on the wall.
He looked as though he was stuck in a difficult and upsetting situation he couldn’t get out of. He took big drags of his cigarette, and after a long while, he slowly turned to look at Fatty. “Fatty...”
His voice sounded a little far off as he said, “Have you ever regretted anything? I’m talking about the kind of regret you feel when you can’t forgive yourself no matter how you think about it.”
–
Ji Yi was the only one left in the room.
She opened the boxes of takeout that Fatty brought and picked some snacks that she liked. She took a few bites but felt too full, so she pulled out a tissue to wipe her mouth clean.
Sitting in the room by herself, she was so bored that she swiped her phone lazily for a while to check out her Weibo and Moments. Seeing as there really wasn’t much to look at, Ji Yi figured she might as well put her phone away.
Perhaps it was because Fatty got interrupted by He Jichen at an important moment that Ji Yi was still very curious inside. With nothing to do, she thought back to “Cola girl” again.
From Fatty’s tone, it was no secret who Cola girl was and she should know who it was...
Ji Yi furrowed her brows and racked her brain over it for a long time, but she couldn’t remember any of the girls who were close to He Jichen. In the end, she simply shook her head and gave up thinking about it. She was going to ask Fatty when he came back.
With no idea where the two of them went to talk, Ji Yi noticed they still hadn’t returned yet, but she wanted to go to the restroom. She called for a waiter to let them know they hadn’t finished eating yet. Then she headed for the corridors and walked in the direction of the restroom.
After walking for about twenty meters, she reached the corner of the stairway. Before she made a turn, Ji Yi stumbled upon He Jichen’s and Fatty’s voices.
What a coincidence... The two of them are out here?
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