Aku memejamkan mata, menunggu akhir yang tak bisa dihindari.
Bilah yang menyayat udara dingin itu tak pernah meleset. Satu-satunya pilihan adalah bagaimana cara menghadapinya. Aku bisa mencoba melawan, atau meronta, atau berteriak memanggil bantuan. Tapi apa gunanya? Hanya ada kami berdua di ruangan ini. Lagipula, melawan Thanatos bukanlah pilihan yang masuk akal.
Aku membuka mataku, menatap lurus ke arahnya.
"Thanatos."
Bilah yang sedetik lalu meluncur ke arah leherku, mendadak berhenti. Jaraknya begitu dekat, sampai-sampai aku bisa merasakan dinginnya logam di kulit. Aku benar-benar berpacu dengan maut. Satu langkah lagi, dan aku sudah jadi mayat.
Tapi aku menebak dengan benar.
Thanatos, Dewa Maut versi Etius. Dalam mitos aslinya, dia adalah personifikasi kematian itu sendiri. Tapi di sini, dia hanyalah dewa berpangkat tinggi yang bertugas mengawasi kematian. Jika dia mati, kematian tidak akan hilang. Meski begitu, dia tetaplah dewa yang bisa membunuhku dalam sekejap.
Aku menghela napas lega, mencoba menenangkan diri. Aku masih hidup. Untuk saat ini.
Matanya yang keemasan menatapku tajam, dipenuhi amarah dan kebingungan. Bocah berwujud dewa itu menggenggam erat bilahnya, tapi tidak bergerak.
"Berhenti." Aku berkata, mencoba mengendalikan situasi. "Kau tahu siapa aku."
Aku tidak yakin apakah dia mengerti ucapanku. Tapi dari caranya menatapku, aku yakin dia mengerti bahwa aku mengenalnya.
"Aku tidak akan menyebarkan berita tentangmu. Tapi kau harus pergi sekarang."
Dia menatapku beberapa saat, lalu dengan enggan menurunkan bilahnya. Tanpa berkata apa-apa, dia melangkah mundur dan menghilang dalam kegelapan, meninggalkanku sendirian di kamar yang kembali sunyi.
Aku jatuh terduduk di lantai, tubuhku gemetar hebat. Napasku tersengal-sengal, seolah baru saja lari maraton. Aku masih hidup. Aku benar-benar masih hidup.
Untunglah aku berhasil menebak identitasnya. Mata emas, sayap hitam, wujud bocah. Dan yang paling penting, cara kerjanya yang khas: merasuki manusia dan membuat mereka bunuh diri. Itu ciri khas Thanatos.
Tapi di balik rasa syukur, ada kecemasan yang menggerogoti. Kenapa Thanatos menargetkanku? Apa hubungannya dengan 'Weaving' yang ada di tubuhku?
Mungkin karena aku manusia langka yang memiliki kekuatan dewa. Atau mungkin karena Frondier, tubuh yang kutinggali ini, dianggap mengganggu para dewa.
Aku tidak tahu. Tapi yang pasti, kejadian ini bukan kebetulan.
Aku menatap tanganku yang masih gemetar. "Sepertinya aku harus terbiasa dengan rasa takut ini."
Aku tidak tahu sampai kapan aku bisa bertahan. Thanatos tidak bisa sembarangan bertanya kepada dewa-dewa lain tentang diriku. Jadi, aku mungkin punya waktu. Tapi aku harus memanfaatkannya sebaik mungkin.
* * *
Di ruang kelas, Quinie merenung.
Frondier de Roach, putra kedua keluarga Roach. Dia sudah duduk di tahun ketiga Constel, dan Quinie mengira dia tidak perlu mempedulikan keluarga Roach lagi. Dia baru tahu nama Frondier setelah pria itu masuk akademi. Dia tahu Azier punya adik, tapi tidak pernah memikirkannya.
Dia mencoba mencari informasi, tapi tidak ada yang berharga. Satu-satunya yang dia dapat: Frondier pemalas dan lalai. Itu pun terdengar masuk akal.
"Quinie, kamu melamun apa?"
Sahabatnya, Anne, menyenggol lengannya. Quinie menoleh sekilas.
"Anne, menurutmu Frondier itu orangnya seperti apa?"
"Hah? Jangan-jangan, Quinie, kamu lihat wajah Frondier, akhirnya kamu merasakan getaran cinta? Kamu sudah ngerasain itu? Manis-asam, indahnya...!"
"Aku cuma minta informasi."
Anne terkekeh. "Heh."
"Frondier, ya? Aku kurang tahu. Biasanya dia cuma tidur di kelas. Tapi akhir-akhir ini kayaknya tidak."
"Selain yang sudah semua orang tahu di Constel?"
"Ya, aku juga cuma tahu itu."
Hm, masuk akal. Anne memang tidak akan tahu banyak tentang Frondier.
Quinie mengganti pertanyaannya. "Kamu tahu kejadian waktu itu, kan? Frondier memecahkan kotak kaca penyimpan Mistilteinn."
"Oh, aku tahu! Itu ramai banget sampai beberapa hari lalu."
"Menurutmu gimana?"
Anne memiringkan kepala, berpikir sejenak, lalu tersenyum lebar. "Nekat! Bodoh!"
Ya. Itulah opini publik tentang Frondier saat itu.
Bahkan jika itu demi ayahnya, bagaimana kalau benda itu benar-benar terkutuk? Siapa yang mau melihat anaknya mati?
'Tapi menurutku, dia terlihat penuh keyakinan.'
Pasti begitu. Kalau tidak, dia tidak akan berani melakukan hal nekat seperti itu.
-Aku tidak pernah takut pada hal-hal seperti itu.
Quinie tertawa. Ini pertama kalinya dia melihat seseorang berbicara seperti itu. Terutama di tempat di mana orang-orang yang dicintai para dewa terkenal berkumpul.
"Baiklah, aku sudah memutuskan."
"Kalau aku menginginkan sesuatu, aku harus menjemputnya."
Quinie berkata dengan tangan bersilang, pikiran berkecamuk, dan mata berbinar.
Anne, memperhatikannya, bertanya-tanya, "Apa mungkin Quinie benar-benar mengejar Frondier?"
He's controlling my body, trying to make me kill myself with my own hand.
A perfect disguise for a suicide leaving no evidence behind.
My right hand just trembled, not following my will at all.
The blade was getting closer.
I tried to clench my teeth with force.
I can still bite down on my molars.
I changed my thinking. I couldn't resist with strength.
So what I need to do is to make him stop his own actions.
It was still possible to bite through it.
I could bite through it while my mouth can still move.
I met his piercing golden eyes.
Holding my breath, I moved my lips.
My voice was barely a whisper.
But the damn god should understand it.
If he is a god, he should be able to do that much.
His golden eyes widened.
At the same time, the boy's body moved away from me.
The blade that was coming at me stopped.
I regained my freedom and exhaled roughly.
Ho, holy moly, I almost died……!
The god in the form of a boy shouted something at me with a face filled with panic and anger.
I have no idea what you're saying, idiot.
Then, he quickly made a troubled expression as if he had just thought of something.
He bit his lower lip, glanced at me once, and walked through the closed gap.
Soon, the gap closed and my room returned to its usual state.
I collapsed as my tension eased.
The Greek god of death, 'Thanatos'.
However, in Etius, he is not 'death itself' as portrayed in the original myth.
He is a powerful and high-ranking god, but if he disappears, death does not disappear. Despite being in charge of death, he can also die.
Anyway, I'm lucky I figured out his identity.
Golden eyes, black wings, and the form of a young boy.
There aren't many gods who possess all three characteristics, but I had to risk my life to find out.
The most important clue is the killing method.
Just like now, when a god possesses a human's body and makes them kill themselves, there will be no trace left, making it suicide.
That's Thanatos, the god of death, for you.
Among the gods, only a few know Thanatos' face. Those few are higher-ranking gods than Thanatos.
"I simply took a shot in the dark, but from Thanatos' perspective, it wouldn't seem that way.
To him, the fact that I know his face would appear as if I have a close connection with other higher gods.
Therefore, killing me now would be risky.
That’s why I mentioned his name, hoping he would think this way.
Yet, what I can say is,
“...It feels like a tremendous crisis but also a tremendous opportunity.”
The attempt on my life was surely because of the 'Weaving'.
Why the Weaving angered a god, I don’t know.
But there has never been a case in the history of Etius where a human has affected a god’s emotions .
“Could it be that Frondier, lacking divine power, is despised by the gods?”
Initially, humans with divine power are rare, and it’s unlikely that Frondier is despised by all gods.
In any case, this ability called Weaving could be more dangerous and powerful than I thought.
I glanced down at my hands. The trembling wouldn’t stop.
“I guess I need to get used to fear.”
I don’t know how far my bravado will take me.
Thanatos can’t just directly ask the other higher gods about me, so I’ll probably have some time.
But I need to prepare as much as possible until then.
Quinie thought about him in the classroom.
Frondier de Roach, the second son of the Roach family.
Now in her third year at Constel, she thought she wouldn’t have to care about the Roach family anymore.
She only learned of Frondier’s name after he enrolled.
She knew Azier had a brother but didn’t think much of him.
She tried digging for information just in case, but there was nothing worthwhile. The only information was that he was very lazy and negligent, which seemed credible.
“Quinie, what are you thinking about so deeply?”
Quinie's friend spoke up beside her.
Quinie glanced at her subtly.
"Anne, what do you think about Frondier?"
"What? Don't tell me, Quinie, seeing that face of Frondier's, have you finally felt those fresh feelings? Have you experienced it? That sweet and sour, that lovely...!"
"I'm asking for information."
Anne chuckled, "Heh."
"Frondier, well, I don't know. He used to just sleep during class. Though it seems not to be the case recently."
"Anything but what everyone in Constel already knows."
"That's all I know too."
Hmm, that makes sense.
Anne wouldn't know much about Frondier.
Instead, Quinie asked another question.
"You know about the incident a while back, right? The one where Frondier broke the transparent case storing Mistilteinn."
"Oh, I know! It was really noisy until a few days ago."
"What do you think about that?"
Anne tilted her head, pondering, then flashed a wide smile.
She cheerfully responded, "It was reckless! Stupid!"
Yes. That was the public's opinion of Frondier regarding the incident at the time.
Even if it was for his father, what if it really was a cursed item?
Who would want to see their son die?
'But to me, he seemed filled with certainty.'
He must have been. Otherwise, he wouldn't have dared to do such a thing fearlessly.
-I've never been afraid of such things.
Quinie laughed. It was the first time she had seen someone talk like that.
Especially in a place where people who are loved by various famous gods gather.
"Alright, I've decided."
"If I want something, I should go get it."
With her arms crossed, progressing thoughts in her head, and with shining eyes, Quinie spoke.
Watching her, Anne wondered, "Could Quinie really be after Frondier?"
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