Fatih, peringatan dari Milton Keynes. Jangan memandangnya sebelah ringan.
Fatih, yang sedang berada di tengah Hamilton Straight, langsung membuka matanya, sejenak bingung mendengar apa yang dikatakan radio. Tapi hal itu tak mengganggu sekali pun inputnya; pola yang sama diulang, hanya disesuaikan dengan aus ban dan mobil yang semakin ringan seiring boranya habis di setiap putaran. Baru beberapa tikungan kemudian, saat ia keluar dari The Loop, ia akhirnya memahami maksud pesan itu, dan hanya setelah Apollo menunjuk ke kemungkinan paling besar.
Akibatnya, Fatih heran bagaimana tindakannya bisa ditafsirkan sebagai menganggapnya main-main, padahal ia benar-benar berusaha keras dan menganggapnya serius sebagaimana seorang pun yang bisa.
"Itu yang orang sebut sebag sebanding. Kita berdua melihat hal yang sama, tapi karena perbezaan cara menggapainya, pandangan berbeda bisa timbul meski dari informasi yang sama," kata Apollo saat ia melihat Fatih sedang berusaha mencari penjelasannya. Di mata Fatih, tindakan menutup matanya tidak sekali pun terlihat seperti apa yang sedang dibahas.
Baru pada saat itulah ia mengaitkannya dengan diri Helmut sendiri dan memahami mengapa ia bisa menafsirkan dan bertindak demikian. Sebagai seorang pengemudi yang sedang menuju kejembaraan, bahkan pernah memenangkan 24 Hours of Le Mans, karirnya tiba-tiba dihentikan ketika sebuah batu yang terlempar dari ban belakang Emerson Fittipaldi menembus visernya dan mengenai matanya kiri, yang berakibat pada kehilangan matanya kirinya dan berakhirnya karier balapannya.
Jadi bagi seseorang yang pernah merasakan yang terburuk dari situasi yang tak terhindarkan, tindakan Fatih menutup mata sengaja bukan dilihat sebagai seorang pahlawan, melainkan sebagai seorang pengemudi yang cerobak yang sengaja meningkatkan risiko cedera ketika tingkat dasarnnya sudah cukup tinggi.
"Sepertinya kita harus membatasinya hanya pada simulasi," kata Fatih sambil menghela napas. Baru saja ia menyadari bahwa selama ia tidak mengungkapkan sistem dan eksistensi Apollo untuk bertindak sebagi penjaganya—jika saja mereka percaya padahnya—maka ia tak akan pernah bisa lol freedom lagi melakukan kekalangan-kekalapannya di lintasan. Ia juga tahu bahwa ini bukanlah akhir dari topik ini sama sekali, dan ia disampaikan singkat karena sisanya ditahan hingga setelah ia meninggalkan lintasan. Anehnya, mereka bahkan tidak bilang padanya untuk masuk ke box segera.
Dan keherannya itu pun langsung terjawab saat ia keluar dari Stowe. {Box, Box, Box,} sebagai ia dipanggil ke kolong.
.......
"Jika aku mendengar, melihat, atau mendapatkan laporan bahwa kamu mencoba melakukan hal-hal bodoh seperti ini lagi dan membahayakan diri sendiri serta orang lain di lintasan, maka aku akan mengambil langkah ekstrim—dari menunda musimmu hingga kamu belajar tidak melakukannya lagi, atau bahkan membatalkan kontrakmu sama sekali, mengerti?" Suara Helmut yang kental dan tidak bisa dimiliki terdengar dari ponsel yang diletakkan di tengah meja di seberang ruangan.
Fatih dan Alex dudak di salah satu ujung panjang meja dengan Michael Scott, kepala seluruh program pelatihan, dan Borris Andreason, kepala program pelatihan dari sisi Arden Motorsport, dudak di sisi berlawanan.
"Kujulangi, apakah kamu mengerti kata-kataku?" tanya Helmut lagi saat ia tidak menerima tanggapan dari Fatih yang kagum memandang ponselnya.
"Aku bisa memahami risiko yang mungkin terlihat dari perspektifmu, tapi..."
"Apa maksudmu dengan 'terlihat'?" interupsi Helmut. "Kamu sedang mencoba membela tindakan ketika ada bukti yang jelas? Anak-anak zaman sekarang."
"Kamu harus mendengarkan argumenku dulu sebelum menyimpulkan," kata Fatih setelah tarik napas dalam, berusaha memahami perspektif Helmut, tapi ia juga perlu membela dirinya dari ancaman yang datang di masa depan, atau ia berisiko mendapatkan dampaknya.
Argumentasi diri terasa sulit karena bukti yang dapat dipakai di pihaknya tak dapat digunakan, tapi demi menetapkan preseden yang baik dan hubungan yang adil antardua, serta menghindari salah satu pihak memiliki keuntungan atas dirinya, ia tetap perlu didengar di hadapan semua orang sebelum menerima peringatan ini.
"Kamu masih ingin membela diri?"
"Ya, dan aku tidak akan mengakui peringatan ini sampai versiku didengar," katanya dengan tegas. Meskipun tonenya masih terdengar seperti remaja berusia empat belas, keputuhannya tetap jelas terasa.
"Aku tidak menutup mata untuk melakukannya, tapi untuk merasakan bagaimana ban bereaksi terhadap gaya yang diterimanya dan bagaimana proses pengikisannya bekerja, yang kudilakukan hanya di lurusan sambil menghitung di kepalaku berapa lama waktu yang dibutuhkan, karena sudah kuduga berapa detik yang dibutuhkan untuk menempuh jarak-jarak itu. Aku yakin aku tidak membuat kesalahan saat melakukannya, jadi meskipun aku memahami reaksimu..." Sedang dalam salah satu omongannya yang panjang untuk membenarkan alasannya, Fatih memandang ponselnya dan melihat wallpaper, artinya panggilan sudah terputus.
"Sejak kapan dia memutuskan panggilan itu?" tanya Fatih ke Michael.
"Sekitar seperti sekarang, sekitar waktu kamu mulai membenarkan alasanmu," katanya sambil menggerogoti alisnya sambil memeriksa ponselnya. "Aku akan mencoba menyampaikan argumenmu kepadanya, tapi untuk saat ini, kamu harus kembali dan melanjutkan program sesuai jadwal," katanya. Hampir saja ia ingin menambah sesuatu, lalu bunyi notifikasi terdengar. Ia langsung mengkliknya sebelum melanjutkan, "Sepertinya sesi latihanmu untuk hari ini selesai, jadi kumpulkan barangmu dan kembali ke Milton Keynes. Helmut menunggu di sana untuk berdiskusi.""
"Tapi ia masih harus menebus waktu yang hilang karena tidak latihan seharian kemarin setelah kecelakaan," kata Alex, berusaha membela kepentikan Fatih yang latihannya tiba-tiba dipotong.
"Kamu harus membahasnya dengannya saat bertemu," kata Michael dengan jelas bahwa ia tidak bersengaja terlibat dalam situasi ini. Setelah semua, ia tidak berpihak pada Fatih, melainkan pada Helmut. Sambil menatap Fatih, ia menambahkan, "Kamu hanya perlu menundukkan kepalamu sekali, dan tidak akan ada masalah ini," dengan nada yang jelas menggambarkan kesalahannya pada Fatih atas keputungan situasinya dan konsekuensinya.
"Jika kamu menundukkan kepalamu sekali saat tidak perlu, kamu akan terus-menerus melakukannya,", balas Fatih saat berdiri dari meja, tidak ingin menghabiskan waktu lagi sekarang keputusan sudah diambil. Ia bahkan tidak mempertimbangkan untuk berdebat atau mencoba menjelaskan dirinya ke Michael, yang jelas berpihak ke Helmut, ingin berbicara langsung dengan Helmut. Reaksinya terhadap situasi ini akan menentukan aratan hubungan antara mereka. Berbeda dari pengemudi lain, ia memiliki keuntungan yang cukup kuat untuk tidak perlu berhubungan diri dengan pihak lain hanya karena mereka adalah sponsornya.
.......
"Apa kamu yakin boleh melakukan ini? Kamu tahu, ini Helmut; ia bisa membatalkan kontrakmu sesuai keinginannya," kata Alex sambil berlari untuk menyusul Fatih yang sedikit di ke depan.
"Aku tahu ia disentuh oleh banyak orang, tapi ia tidak bisa melakukannya sekarang, karena jika ia melakukannya tanpa alasan yang pasti, ia harus membayar denda karena melanggar kontrak," kata Fatih, tapi ia tidak menjelaskan lebih jauh mengenai sisi kontrak itu. "Jika pengemudi lain mendengar apa yang kamu katakan, mereka akan mengatakan kamu gila," kata Alex sambil tertawa, menyadari betul itu benar. Jelas bagi siapa saja yang mengenal Fatih, ia adalah topik panas di antara tim dan akademi, dengan banyak yang sudah mengirim penawaran untuk merekrutnya. Begitu Red Bull mengambil keputusan, ia akan pergi tanpa pun melihat belakang sekali.
Namun, semua itu bergantung pada bagaimana percakapan mereka berjalan, meskipun awalnya itu tidak dimulai dengan baik.
{Fatih, warning from Milton Keynes. Don’t take it as child’s play.}
Fatih, who was in the middle of the Hamilton Straight, immediately opened his eyes, puzzled for a moment as to what the radio was talking about. But that didn’t interrupt any of his inputs; they repeated the same pattern, only adjusted to tire wear and the car getting lighter as it spent fuel with each lap. It wasn’t until a few corners later, as he exited The Loop, that he finally understood what the message’s intent was, but only after Apollo pointed at the most likely possibility.
As a result, Fatih wondered how exactly his actions were interpreted as him taking it as child’s play, as he had been giving it his all and taking it as seriously as anyone could.
"That’s what people call perception dissonance. Both of you are seeing the same thing, but due to your differences in perceiving it, different views can be reached despite the same information," Apollo said when he saw Fatih trying to find the reason. In Fatih’s eyes, the action of closing his eyes didn’t for a moment seem to be what they were talking about.
It was only then that he connected it to Helmut himself and understood why he might perceive it as such and react that way. As a driver who was on his way to becoming great, having even won the 24 Hours of Le Mans, his career was abruptly brought to an end when a stone thrown from the rear tire of Emerson Fittipaldi pierced through his visor and struck him in his left eye, leading to both the loss of his left eye and the end of his driving career.
So to him, who had experienced the worst of an inevitable situation, Fatih’s deliberate closing of his eyes was not seen as a daredevil but as a reckless driver who was deliberately increasing the risk of injury when the base level itself was already high enough.
"Looks like we are going to have to limit it to the simulation," Fatih said with a sigh. He had just realized that so long as he wasn’t going to reveal the system and the existence of Apollo to act as his guard, if they even believed him in the first place, then he was not going to be allowed to get away with any of his shenanigans on the track again. He also knew that this was not the end of this topic at all, and it had been made short because the rest of it was being held back until after he left the track. It was even a wonder why they didn’t tell him to pit immediately.
And his wonder was answered immediately the moment he exited Stowe. {Box, Box, Box,} as he was called into the pits.
........
"If I hear, see, or receive any report that you are trying to do some foolish things like this again and endanger yourself and others on the track, then I’m going to take aggressive measures, from delaying your season until you learn not to do that, or canceling your contract entirely, understood?" Helmut’s firm, no-nonsense voice was heard from the other side of the phone that was placed at the center of the room.
Fatih and Alex were sitting on one of the long ends of the table with Michael Scott, the head of the entire training program, and Borris Andreason, the head of this training program from the Arden Motorsport side, sitting on the opposite side.
"I repeat, did you understand my words?" Helmut asked again when he didn’t receive a response from Fatih, who was looking at the phone, dumbfounded.
"I can understand the possible risk perceived from your end, but..."
"What do you mean by ’perceived’?" Helmut interrupted him. "Are you trying to defend your actions when there is clear evidence of it? Children these days."
"You have to listen to my argument first before you come to a conclusion," Fatih said after a deep breath, trying to be understanding of Helmut’s side of the view, but he also needed to defend himself from such threats ahead of time, or he risked being on the receiving end of things in the future, as this might be used as one of those arguments.
It was going to be difficult to argue for himself due to some of the actionable evidence on his side being unusable, but for the sake of setting a good precedent and an equal relationship between the two sides and avoiding one side having leverage over him, he still needed to have his side of things heard in front of everyone present before he was to accept the warning.
"You are still trying to argue back?"
"Yes, and I’m not going to acknowledge any warning until my side of the situation is listened to," he said firmly. Although his tone was still that of a fourteen-year-old, the conviction behind his words was still clear.
"I was not closing my eyes for the sake of it, but to try to get a sense of how the tire reacted to the forces subjected to it and how the degradation process works, which I have only done on the straights while counting in my head how much time passed, because I already knew how many seconds it would take for me to cover those distances. I’m confident that I didn’t make any mistakes while doing that, so although I understand your reaction to it..." Fatih, who was in the middle of one of his long ramblings to try and justify his reasoning, looked at the phone and saw that it was showing the wallpaper, meaning the call had already been disconnected.
"Since when did he end the call?" Fatih turned to Michael Scott and asked.
"A minute ago, so about when you started giving out your reasoning," Michael said as he scratched his eyebrows after he picked up the phone and checked the call duration.
"I will try to deliver your argument to him, but for now, you should return to resume with the program as scheduled," Michael said. Just as he was about to add something else, a notification sound was heard. He immediately clicked on it before he added, after a short pause, "Looks like your practice time for today is over, so you should gather your things and head back to Milton Keynes. Helmut is waiting for you there to talk."
"But he still had to make up for the lost time due to not having practiced the entire day yesterday after the crash," Alex said, trying to argue for Fatih’s sake, who just had his practice time abruptly cut.
"You will have to argue it with him when you see him," Michael said, making it clear that he was not planning to interfere in the situation at all. After all, he was not on Fatih’s side, but Helmut’s. As he looked at Fatih, he added, "You could have lowered your head once, and none of this would have been a problem," in a tone that made it very obvious that he was faulting Fatih for how the situation went and the consequences of it.
"If you bow once when it wasn’t required, you end up doing it again and again," Fatih said back as he stood from the table, not planning to waste any more time now that a decision had been made. He didn’t even consider arguing or trying to explain himself to Michael, who was obviously on Helmut’s side, wanting to have the conversation with Helmut himself. His reaction to the situation would decide the direction in which their relationship goes. Unlike other drivers, he had leverage, one powerful enough to allow him to not needlessly put himself in a precarious position, so he wasn’t really required to be subservient to the other side just because they were sponsoring him.
......
"Are you sure it is okay to do that? You know it is Helmut; he can terminate your contract according to his whims," Alex said as he rushed to Fatih, who was a few steps ahead of him.
"I know he is feared by many people, but he can’t do that to me at the moment, because if he does that without a conclusive reason, he will have to pay penalties as he will be breaching the contract," Fatih said, but didn’t elaborate further on that side of things since it was related to the contract.
"If other drivers heard what you were saying, they would call you crazy," Alex said, chuckling, knowing that it was true. It was clear to anyone who knew Fatih that he was a very hot topic among teams and academies, with many having already sent their offers to recruit him. The moment Red Bull made such a decision, he would be leaving without even looking back once.
However, all of that was dependent on how their conversation went, though it hadn’t really started on a good foot.
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